Film Review: The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo

I went into this film knowing nothing about the book it is based upon and with the incorrect assumption that I was going to be watching something akin to The Bourne series but with a double hard emo-chick who rides a motorcycle and has a cool tattoo. Instead I was treated to something quite different.

The girl with The Dragon Tattoo or Män som hatar kvinnor as it is called in it's native tongue is a thriller in which the titular 'girl' (Noomi Rapace) is seen but not heard for the majority of the movie and watches the genesis of the main plot from afar by hacking into investigative journalist's Mikael Blomkvist's (Michael Nyqvist) computer.

It's a plot device that allows for the introduction of a rather difficult and somewhat unlikable protagonist , who plays a passive role not only in the main story but in her life too. The girl's, Lisbeth's, money is controlled by her probation officer, who makes her relinquish more than control of her money to him also. It is not until she leverages control of both her own life and the probation officer by exacting an act of revenge upon him that she enters the life of Mikael and the story begins proper. By this time she and Mikael are two intriguing and full characters with a seemingly impossible task ahead of them: solve a 40 year old murder .

What follows feels a lot like a TV drama with Lisbeth and Mikael playing the part of the meddlesome, troubled but genius investigator pitting their selves against a cast of suspicious characters all with motive and opportunity and all with secrets too. As the two investigate their only lead an unbelievable relationship grows between the two of them which I can only assume is more believable in the book, but here it just seems like a concession to an adult audience who may otherwise grow tired of the Sunday matinée like fare.

An unlikeable lead, a plot that goes from the intriguing to the formulaic and a love affair that does not feel authentic didn't stop me from being utterly fascinated with the tale and beguiled by the setting: lush forests, snow covered fields an large open expanses filmed with reverence and love. The pace of the film and the performances are both fine, and the script is peppered with enough humour to both balance the darker themes and make up for the cheesy romantic interludes.

The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo is on general release in the UK from the 12th of March.

Film Review: The Last Station

I went to see this film expecting to be confused by the philosophies and politics of Tolstoy, to be bewildered by references to a massive text, War and Peace, that I have never read and until today had no plan to read either.

What I got from this film instead was both surprising and welcome. The Last Station is not a story about the fight for the copyright of Count Leo Tolstoy's writing but instead it is a drama which deals with the themes of love, possession, betrayal and freedom.

Titles at the beginning of the film inform the ignorant (i.e. me) that Tolstoy was revered almost as a living legend and was regarded by some as a prophet. His philosophies about social justice, private possession and love are revered by many and as a whole these philosophies take on the moniker of Tolstoyism.

The main protagonist (James McAvoy) is a young Tolstoyan who is employed as secretary to Leo and in this position as privileged outsider witnesses Leo dismantle his own marriage, setting aside the wishes of his wife to pander to his sycophantic disciples.

The Countesses (Helen Mirren) attempts to manipulate, corner and hurt her husband seem to this viewer to be a cry for her husband's attention and for his love. Unfortunately her attempts become so desperate that it becomes far too easy for Leo's aide, played by a particularly snivelling Paul Gambaccini to poison the marriage further and convince Leo to first betray and then leave his wife.

At times the drama seems schizophrenic, with passionate fights being allayed by flirtation and loving couples turning their backs on each other within the course of a conversation. Yet the emotion and sentiment never seems insincere, and the overlal tone of the movie is uplifting and hopeful.

Ultimately of all the themes within this movie, the most important is love and it is successfully communicated that despite the tribulations all the characters go through, their main motivation is love. This achievement alone makes The Last Station a must see, add to this great performances from all the principles, beautiful scenery in the Russian country side and Tolstoy's old home, and competent direction from Michael Hoffman and the result is a movie that I can't recommend strongly enough.

Film Review: Arthur

Arthur is a comedy which relies totally on the terrible jokes of an mostly unlikeable lead who acts inebriated for the whole film. At some point in the movie you realise that you're laughing at an alcoholic, or at least that you're not laughing at an alcoholic and this is before realising that the premise of the movie is ridiculous to the point of being unbelievable.

Arthur, a bored and spoilt multi-millionaire and alcoholic, prides himself on being funny and rich, his inheritance is threatened when he refuses to not marry the suitor his parents choose for him. Marriage, in the eyes of her parents is Arthurs right of passage into adulthood, however his wry, snobbish but loving butler and surrogate father correctly surmises that love will be the catalyst for Arthur's growth.

It is the butler who provides the only pathos and emotional interest in the film, and thankfully some comedy with his sarcasm and casual prejudice toward everything and everyone. After he exits the picture in a way that tonally is not handled well at all, and in fact could go unnoticed if you blink, we are left with the a long wedding scene which is basically and literally the punchline to a joke that was never funny, and is actually quite distasteful.

Maybe alcoholism was inherently funny in a bygone era, funny enough maybe to carry a movie with few jokes, a ridiculous plot and very little charm. Unfortunately for Arthur, he has not aged like a good Scotch, and instead a bitter taste is left in the mouth after watching this.

Film Review: Die Hard

Roy Rogers is a clown, a clown with a performing horse and a guitar. He wears the trappings of a Hollywood hero like John Wayne or Zoro but then cracks wise and burst into song like an outmoded TV host as well as a matinee star and a restauranteur.

He's a pussy cat in comparison to John McClain, so it's strange he would prefer Rogers over Rambo because of the "spangly shirts". But there's something of the performer in McClain too. His modus operandi seems to be shock and awe, combined with sass and cheek. Smack talking his enemies over radio waves and provoking them to reveal their plan or screw up in some other way.

In Die Hard, John get's his ass kicked four ways from Sunday, but he finds the reserves to pull through. Most of Bruce Willis' performance in this film is played alone, with most of the dialogue spoken into a walkie talkie. These moments are great for fleshing our character and to stand as a counterpoint to some hectic action and slow-mo violence (an impromptu kneecapping with the victim then falling through a plate of glass is particularly shocking).

But it's the violence that we came for, the redemption of the broken down old cop, the reconciliation of the broken down marriage and even the foiling of the bad guys plan doesn't matter as much as the guns and explosions that lead up to it. And it's on this count that Roy and John couldn't be further apart and thank god for that.

Yippe Ki Yay!

Film Reviw: The Matrix

It's hard to disassociate a film from the creator's latter works. Francis Ford Coppola will always be celebrated for The Godfather parts I and II but then will he ever be forgiven for part III? Eddie Murphy is a riot in his stand up movies Raw and Delirious and great in Coming to America and even Shrek, but Norbit is surely an indication of a career in decline, right?

Well, imagine being The Wachowski Brothers, a pair of film makers who's first film Bound, a tight and sexy thriller, becomes a cult classic and their second film, The Matrix becomes the success that they just can't match. Two films in and on the slopes to Has-been-ville already, it's a shame.

It's not actually this reviewers opinion that the two follow up films in the Matrix trilogy were abject failures. I believe that the follow ups failed only in matching up to the fanboy hype. Was that hype ever necessary? I don't think so, The Matrix is good, don't get me wrong, but it's not the masterpiece that the fanatic's fervour would lead us to believe.

It got our attention because it was a surprise, it seemed to have come out of nowhere, with new film techniques, a fresh take on kung-fu and enough gun-porn to take make any bullet fetishist wet. It kept our attention because it painted a non-reality so visceral that we could all imagine being inside of it, and escaping our own.

The film's main conceit, that our reality was a construct that we could escape at the drop of a pill spoke to me and my generation, allowed us to fantasise and dream beyond the new messiah story line present in the film. For me, that was the main strength of The Matrix, that the scope was so limited, the ending so open, that as the credit rolled I couldn't stop thinking about the possibilities for the characters and for the story.

Film Review: The Chronicles of Riddick

I find Riddick to be an enigmatic and engaging character. He's stoic in the face of danger, self-preserving and ruthless but has a set of values which in his first story saw him attempt to lead the less capable to safety.

This time around there is more in jeopardy than the lives of a disparate band, there is the diversity of the universe at stake as the religious cult of The Necromancer invade and mind-wash one planet at a time.

Riddick can not manage to avoid the maelstrom of The Necromunger because it has been foretold that he alone will be their downfall, so quite unintelligently the Necromancer peruse their fate instead of letting him to his naturally selfish ways. This sets us up for some awesome set pieces, the most exciting of which is a race against the dawn to the last ship off of a planet where the sunlight will burn you to death.

Dame Judy Dench appears in a career misstep as a ghostly fortune teller, and even with her credentials this movie will only ever be of the B-type. All other principles are capable and the dialogue is chucklesome rather than absurd. But despite the grander setting over the stars and the story about the sanitisation of culture through extremist worship, Chronicles is simply a balls out action movie and probably more enjoyable for it too.

Film Review: The Mask of Phantasm

Gotham's criminals are being stalked by a dark cowled and masked figure. Silent in the night this menace preys upon them, first filling them with dread, then toying with them before eventually catching them and killing them.

No, this is not Batman gone rouge, this is the titular Masked figure who seeks revenge upon Gotham's underworld on a trajectory that leads straight to Gotham's most maniacal villain, The Joker.

The story's twists and turns are sign-posted pretty clearly and as such come as no surprise. However the story zips along at such a pace with revelations about character's that are interesting enough to keep a viewer engaged and forgiving. What needs to be forgiven, apart from the slightly obvious plot, is some laboured dialogue and an unfortunate restriction of the medium in that makes characters feel as life-like as, well, cartoons.

For Batman lore, adventure and action this is a great watch. Stylish, fast paced and a lot of fun.

Film Review: E.T.

A story about a boy who shelters a lost and homesick alien and grows to befriend and love him. The boys love for the alien creates a bond between the two that is so strong that they share each other's emotional and physical states. This is hilarious when in one scene the alien gets drunk while left home alone whilst the boy, Eliot, goes to school. The aliens drunkenness results in Eliot liberating a classroom full of deathrow amphibians and passionately kissing the girl he admires, while the alien watches soppy movies and eats junk food.

However things go awry when the alien's homesickness manifests as an ailment that begins to kill him and his now symbiotic human host too. Throw into the mix the further complicating factor of the government wanting to capture the alien and what started as a moving account of friendship turns into a race against the authorities and time to return the alien to his ship and safe from the clutches of the government.

With great comic moments and touchingly sweet displays of affection from a young and believable cast and a very convincing alien creature, this film is an enduring classic.

Film Review: The Reader

Films about Nazis fascinate me, so any review I write about a film that touches on that period of German and world history is going to be slightly one sided. A better testament to this film (would be just about anything, but…) would be the amount of praise the lead has had heaped upon her for her performance, it is truly exceptional.

The Reader is a story of first love, and its simplicity, tainted by the realization that the woman who opened your eyes to love and was your first sexual experience was complicit in the murder of 300 Jewish prisoners of Auschwitz.

At moments this film is a comment on the guilt that I can only assume is carried by each successive German generation, a guilt that doesn’t have so much to do with the atrocities of the war itself but with the association to those who committed them. Sometimes those associations are strong, like that between a lovers or family; often it is that between kin and countryman.

It seems that no distance between is great enough when facing the terrible acts face on, even the usual distance between the viewer and the film doesn’t feel like enough when the holocaust is concerned. The Reader captures this feeling of inherited and communicable guilt and sometimes it can feel a little overwhelming.

Film Review: Changeling

Hollywood has few happy stories to tell about L.A. It is presented as a city that has been distorted and twisted into something ugly by the convex glass of the lenses that forever studies it. The media attention that it’s police force, it’s industries and it’s residents are subjected to have, again and again, in films like L.A. Confidential, For Your Consideration and Who Framed Roger Rabit (OK, maybe not that one) shown L.A. to be an immoral Gomorrah-like nest of sin.

In film L.A. is a place where nothing is as it seems and a cover up is never far away. Changeling is about one such cover-up, in this case a mother loses her son and reports him missing, within a campaign of PR spin the L.A. police return a boy to her but it’s not her son. She then struggles to convince the police and the media that the wrong boy has been returned to her.

Angelina Jolie, who plays the mother, puts an amazing performance in and is believable throughout. Her performance does this true story real justice; it is almost wholly responsible for the viewer not abandoning all suspension of disbelief at all. Although the events are almost totally faithful to the truth, they seem so outrageous that they beggar belief. Keep in mind when your disbelief get the better of you though, that this is L.A. and the lens doesn’t distort that much.

Film Review: The Wrestler

Mickey Rourke, right? That’s his name isn’t it? I mean, apparently, back in the day this guy was a big deal and his comeback is the best since Jesus’ resurrection.
Well I will have to admit that if this guy was acting his heart out like this as a young man then he disappeared into a binge of self destruction and solipsism, then, this is the best comeback since… maybe not Jesus but certainly the Cadbury Caramel Bunny (fuck, she’s hot!).

The Wrestler is a character study of a likeable loser who has a chance to turn his life around or to resuscitate his career, and the two acts are mutually exclusive. The adulation he receives in the ring alleviates his boredom and reminds him of his glory days but every knock he takes him closer to a forced retirement that involves a catheter and wheelchair.

His Wrestler alter ego, the glory hound and the boy that has never grown up is at odds with the man he wants to become for his estranged daughter and the woman he loves. Ultimately, the two sides never reconcile and the man retreats to the ring where he has learnt to face the physical pain to escape the emotional pain he feels outside of it.

Film Review: The Spirit

Never read the comic, and never will! And if that was Frank Millers intention, to put a self-confessed comic geek off of an otherwise revered comic… then, well done Frank-my-boy, because that is exactly what you have achieved.

The film starts well, in the vein of pulp detective comics and the hammy acting and style over substance that was evident from the first moments reminded me fondly of the Dick Tracy movie; ‘for kids’ I thought to myself,’ that’s fine’.

But, not even kids would sit through this absolute mess of a movie! It was bad, bad, bad and that is all I have to say about it.

Don’t see it!

Film Review: Australia

Oh no! Australia (the film) is a soppy romance cum western with pretentions of being a movie about race relations in Australia (the country). But one can’t help but wonder why the entire Aboriginal cast play second fiddle to not just the gorgeous (and beautifully photographed) scenery but to every white cast member too. Even the child who the (ridiculous) story centers around has less screen time than the kangaroos, which turn up everywhere by the way.

I enjoyed this film, but only because it was camp, silly and easy going in a matinee movie kind of style. Formulaic, but not to a fault; everyone is a stereotype, each curve of the story arc is familiar, it’s comfortable and unchallenging even when the ugliness of racism raises its head.

Film Reviews

OK, so I have a list of reviews to write longer than my arm. Lately instead of reviewing movies in 3 paragraphs or less I've been watching them and listening to reviews (rather wordier reviews) from The Guardian podcast and from Mark Kermodes BBC podcast, both great podcasts if you like films.

Anyway, here are some reviews I wrote earlier and some films I would like to recommend to you.

Chronicles of Riddick

Riddick is the deadly anti-hero of the film Pitch Black. He is mean, fearless and determined and only seems to derive pleasure from other peoples discomfort. He’s a great character and perfectly played by Vin Diesel in this no-brainer of a popcorn movie.

Special effects stand up even a few years on from this films release and the action compels the viewer to watch on, excited for the next big set piece and then the finale, which comes in a timely fashion and doesn’t disappoint.

Confessions of a Dangerous Mind

Confessions is a movie about a television programmer or thinks that he’s a black-ops assassin, or is a black-ops assassin. The film is stylish, quick and full of dark humour. The joy is to be found in the utterly ridiculous plot, the over the top lead performance and the quirkiness.

Matrix Revolutions

I loved the Matrix when it came out, its rare that a film is thought provoking and easily digestible at the same time. The sequel again didn’t disappoint, Revolutions isn’t a superior movie to the original, the original was seminal, but it's a worthy successor all the same. The fight scenes are far more extravagant, visceral and violent, the love story is believable and the action comes thick and fast.

If it wasn’t for that scene, that computer game scene, then I would have been totally drawn in and willing even to accept the confusion of the scene with the architect. However, when the wires show that obviously all suspension of disbelief is lost and its difficult to then get past such an expensive and obvious gaff.

Flesh Gordon

I have a new computer game for my PSP, it’s called Kollon and it's a puzzle game in the same vein as Columns and Hexic, you trun groups of colured blocks to make groups of boxes with the same colour. It’s a good game. I mention this because during the entirety of Flesh Gordon I played Kollon, because Flesh Gordon is a bad film, for it’s time, for it’s discredit.
In fairness to the film it does try to be bad, it attempts to throw in the cheesiest music, the worst one-liners and the poorest costumes (when the cast is actually dressed), the fact that it achieves this doesn’t make the film ironically bad, it just makes the film bad.

Film Review

Slither



Not a film to watch whilst eating, this total gross –out horror tells the grim tale of a small southern North American town that gets thoroughly worked over by a mutating, flesh eating, tentachled, alien menace.

This is a film which isn’t to proud to aspire to B-movie status and then stop, is fully aware that B-movies could scare as much as they provoke fits of laughter which are only halted by something so hideous your gag reflex kicks in, but so ridiculous your laughing again. A mutant head-butting deer, anyone?

The Pursuit of Happyness

I will start this review by stating three prejudices and biases I have:
1. Movies based on true stories suck!
2. Movies with Will Smith in are great.
3. Movies based on true stories with Will Smith in are fantastic.

Now these nuggets of BS can be attributed to films of my past, thusly:
1. Perfect Storm- a film so bad I left the cinema and screamed abuse at the screen before the film had even got two thirds in.
2. Men In Black! Independence Day!
3. Ali.

So, if we look at the third assertion in each list then The Pursuit of Happyness should be a fantastic film! It’s not, it’s average in every respect apart from it’s length, which is too long.


Mystic River

Fell asleep (due to utter exhaustion through self neglect, not due to the film) close to half way through and then woke up at the end and I didn’t feel like I’d missed anything of significance. The whole ending is signposted so early on its hard to get excited about such an obvious conclusion.

However Sean Penn’s performance is fantastic and so different from his other recent more recent treats too. If I came away from this film with anything I came away knowing Sean Penn is one of the greats of our time.

Billy Elliot

I watched this film with an Australian and was worried that the Newcastle setting and thick accents would be far to foreign for an Ozzie. Twenty minutes into the film and I realised that 1970’s northern England is place in as foreign to me as my friend.

Thankfully the director and actors do a fantastic job of describing the scene, the tension, the political climate and they never forget that this is a story first and foremost about following your heart.
Brimming with artist flair, evident in the choreography, cinematography and the direction, this film is a delight to watch, an amazing film.

Sex and Lucia

A Spanish language film with amazing cinematography, an amazing story which is well acted and handle with aplomb by a fabulous cast. As unrealistic as the situations these characters find themselves seems you’re led willingly as the viewer, eager to see what twist leads to the opening scene (a flashback) and an apparent suicide note. This is proof that there are some stories only film can tell, a masterpiece.

Akeelah and The Bee

Feel good movies don’t come much more cliché than this, but fortunately, the fact that this movie conforms so closely to all other coming of age, feel good movies works in its favour. The situation Akeelah finds herself in is fantastical enough in context but small enough to be believed and understood by the audience. It always feels like a personal struggle that Akeelah is capable of winning. She’s hampered by insecurities and immaturity but the one lesson she learns helps her overcome her hurdles.

Standard fare, but entertaining to the last.

For Your Consideration



Hollywood satires aren’t for people like me. I appreciate that Hollywood is full of vacuous bimbo’s, despicable pond-scum, and fickle users, but as long as they keep turning out great films that make me munch popcorn mesmerised… well, I don’t care.
‘The fame and the backstabbing is hard, boo hoo, and it’s pathetic how these people act’, OK, but it’s not funny.

Pan’s Labyrinth

When you first see the extent of the villains cruelty in this movie you root relentlessly for his demise, and try to ignore the nagging feeling that things are going to get a lot worse before they get better.

Pan’s Labyrinth is a portal to a world of immortals, a mythical escape for the young protagonist of the story. Her fantasy world is in stark contrast to the real world of war and sacrifice that surrounds the Labyrinth itself, but is as threatening and as dark for the viewer, and sometimes even more threatening.

Pan’s Labyrinth is a fantastic film, maybe one of the best of last year. How it was overlooked in the Oscars is an absurdity of such preposterous proportions as to be unfathomable.

Volvre

Another Spanish language film, this time staring Penelope Cruz as a woman trying to cope with the death of her husband whilst running a new business venture and discovering more about her late mother than she may want to.

Volvre manages to make big events seem small and cursory whilst highlighting the characters emotions with the most subtle of set pieces, gestures and scenes. In one poignant scene the despair of being unloved, unappreciated and trapped is communicated without the lead saying a word.

Cruz was nominated for an Oscar in this role and she deserved that recognition. Another amazing film.

Films

Factotum

No one is likeable in this film. Matt Dillon exudes a certain cool but ultimately his character isn’t heroic or inspiring and whilst his troubles are darkly comic enough to keep the audience amused I felt that I was always waiting for something to happen and finding myself disappointed that this is really a film about non-events and non-entities.

Little Miss Sunshine

Films about dysfunctional families that star Steve Martin are rubbish and not just in retrospect, they have always been terrible, save The Jerk… maybe. However films about dysfunctional families that co-star Steve Carrel are genius. This film is so thick with character, pathos, humour and then finally satire. Underneath it all there’s a lesson about life. This is truly a wonderful film.

Trallageda Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

Will Ferrel does absurd so well that you could easily believe that the genre of comedy this film and Anchor Man belong were invented by him alone. Nights takes ridiculous and amps it up a notch. Will plays the idiot savant again; this time he is the number one racer in the redneck filled Nascar circuit until a gay French F1 racer comes to steal his throne. Before Will can face his nemesis he needs to face some demons of his own and burry something from the past, standard story with great comedy.



Pulse

A horror movie set in a college, the main protagonist is a pretty and clever but fragile young girl… sound familiar? People start to die on campus, something sinister is stalking the campus. The good thing about this film is that it doesn’t go for the obvious jump scares, in one scene the cat in the cupboard scare is subverted in a disturbing way. The scariest thing about this film is the way it comments upon a society which is becoming more and more reliant on technology and virtual communities, slightly cyber-xenophobic, but a fun no-brainer none the less.

Casino Royale



The opening credits were gorgeous looking but had no Bondness about them. The opening scene was violent, bloody and harrowing. The first action scene was fantastic with some amazing stunts and although later action scenes came close to it none surpassed it. And Bond his self is finally multi-dimensional, displaying more than just a cool exterior. His heroics fuelled by egotism and arrogance, this is a Bond who I can believe in. Great film!