Are You Missing Japan? No... I'm taking a stroll

"Are you missing Japan?"

No, I'm spending time laying around in parks. And it's a wonderful past time.

Apart from my mirth filled visit to Holland Park I've spent time lounging about in front of Buckingham Palace whilst watching Liz chase squirrels with her camera and then fail to take a picture when the squirrel literally stands a meter from her nose and watches her for 30 seconds. I listened to Samba, Jazz and Funk Fusion then watched demonstrations of body-popping, Judo and Bushido in Shoreditch Park. I watched the colour of the sky change over the London skyline from the vantage of Primrose Hill. And, I walked the dense wooded areas of Hampstead Heath and found myself in long grasses, again looking at the London skyline (and The Red Arrows flying through the sky) from what I think was Parliment Hill.

Britain, even in a sprawling Megapolis like London, lends itself very well to an aimless wander through idyllic fields to find the shelter of an oak or willow. You don't need an tarpaulin, it doesn't have to be April, sunshine alone is enough of an excuse, yet add in music, alcohol and food and you have a little party... everyone is invited.

And when my longing for Japan does become so great that I'm almost ready to jump on a plane (or flying pig) and head back then perhaps a moment in Holland Parks Kyoto Garden will fill me with enough zen spirit of the four seasons to sate my appetite.

And whilst I know that I could be doing far more productive things, like finding a job, procrastinating in this way seems just as worthwhile... food for the soul if you will.

Ireland from my cameraphone

This is how Guinness makes you feel.
This is a Guinness kettle, I think. Yes! I was paying attention.


Here's a boastful vat, to which I say " I drink your Guinness" in a very murderous Daniel Day Lewis way.

Raw, heat, smells!

The black stuff!

The view from the floor outside the Guinness storehouse.


Paul and Paul.

Marion and James.

Vend-a-scent.

Bray, here is the walk, from here to that point up on that there hill.

Here, on 'that there hill' , just a few minutes later... all it took was a hop, skip and a jump.

Nagasaki Weekend

Mobile Phone Pictures: Singapore

The cats of Sarawak.
Dodgy and fake Nintendo Wii's being sold in Singapore.

The greasiest burger I have ever attempted to eat. It was so fatty that it turned the bun grey... I couldn't finish it.

Mango... yum! Ridiculously expensive in Japan, but plentiful and cheap in Singapore. In fact all the food was reasonable and delicious.

These are the same as the statues in Nara and Kyoto apparently, and people are shocked when I tell them that they aren't actually Japanese but Chinese.

Imagine mistaking a sit down toilet for a squatter toiler.

Beautiful and colour bridge near to Boat Quay.

The Merlion.

Travel Entry Two: Gut Rot, The Ministry and The Cat

Yesterday, finished Harry Potter and I'm sure I mentioned this already but I loved it. Skip to the evening and it's more food at the vegeterian indian restaurant, this time something delicious with loads of dips, one of the dips is like tapioca, I eat far too much of everything and set off towards my destination, Liquid Room. I take a train to something Quay and realise that I'm lost, so I walk in the direction I think I need to go and get hot and then get sweaty, it's far more humid than I thought and even in a thin t-shirt I find myself a bit overly moist. So I pass these guys flying what I first thought were kites and then I realised they were controlled by remote, they had mad LED lights all over them and looked like UFOs in the night sky, I watched them do loops and dives and bank and swerve until I noticed another light in the night sky, that of Merchant Hotel, this was the location of Liquid Room, well it used to be.

I arrived at Merchant Hotel much much later to find that Liquid room was now Em Bar, and was rubbish. Full of wine sipping toffs and shirt wearing bores. I didn't stay and a further walk took me to a bus stop, the bus took me too a mall and then a taxi took me to Ministry of Sound. I pay my $28 and walk in, I immediately regret coming as the room I'm in is small and is playing R&B and Hippity Hoppity, I wanted some electro-clash, or I would even settle for house. I sulked for a while and then went to leave. On my way out I noticed that there were two other doors, each leading to other rooms and one room was playing electro, I was so happy, but my stomache wasn't and showed it's mood by making me extremelyt uncomfortable. I was in and out of the toilet with false calls and then close calls, and then the I was fine for about 15 blissful minutes in which I scouted around and decided I would talk to people who looked like the talking type. Before I discovered anyone like that my stomache lurched again, and I was in so much pain that I just wanted to leave and sit on my throne in my cockroach ridden hotel room in the tranny part of town and then go to sleep a bit sore but empty.

I got a taxi back and did just that, cursing the fact that I over ate and seething that I had met no one and managed nothing all night.

The next day I woke and read Edge magazine, I had been saving the Mario Sunshine review for a while, I think that I need to purchase a Wii and that game too. I then left the house for the China Town, I took photo's of some temples and some statues and marvelled at how much art and craft is dedicated to things that don't exist, but I was glad that these things made people feel happy. I went to the oldest Hindu temple in Singapore and was given a piece of bright orange sponge cake, which was given to me by a yound a quiet indian girl in a sahri who offered it to me to help wash away some of her sins. After china town I went to Raffles Sqauare and sat, looked at some of my kanji cards and practice kanji for red, busy and other ones I can't remember right now, I wrote a poem about a woman who blew smoke in my faced and secretly was cursed by me under my breath and with laser eyes on full kill.

I took a trip to the Merlion, got some pictures and then found a Heavy Metal gig in an old victorian building, it was full of teenagers, all of them indians and dressed in black skinny jeans with piercings, and there was me, not indian, no piercings, not enjoying the screaming, the repitive songs, the lack of individuality, integrity or talent. I left during the second band. After going to a few shops including a pretty lacklustre sexshop I took two trains back to the hotel and then slept and washed trash TV. At 12 I took off and got a taxi to Zuok, a club over in Orchard. Felix the House Cat was playing there, and I was eager to see him. It's now 4.23am and I wanted to get this all down before going to bed.

Felix was great, and everyone was really up for it, not much mingling done. I met a girl named Harry and we shouted at eachother over the music for a while until I got bore and went for fresh air, I didn't find her again but spent the rest of the night getting intermate with the dancefloor instead. The highlight of the evening was Felix taking a break from electro to drop Nirvana, Smells Like Teen Spirit.

Travel Entry One: Singapore

Arrived yesterday. The woman at reception is rude, and everytime I've been to reception since someone has been arguing with her, I pity her. My room stinks, litterally, smells like damp, not good. Has a TV, which I've spent far too much time watching, but managed to drag myself away from yesterday to visit Harbor Port and China Town. China Town was the highlight, and had some interesting sights, I ate and drank mango and was wolf whistled at by scantly dressed 'ladies' hanging from bar doors. Was in bed by 12pm.

Woke up today and finished Harry Potter, it was imense, loved it. Then I left the housr to discover SAM, Singapore Art Museum. That was also imense, I saw work from the following artists.

• A. Ramachandran



• Farhad Hussain



• Mark Justiniani



• Abdul Wahab Bin



• Beng Ong

Amongst others. I will make a proper post with actual pictures, links and thoughts, but now is not the time. I'm just about to go to Clarke Quay to find a club called Liquid Room and hopefully have a alright to fantastic time, let's see how that goes sober and alone. HA! No way, just looked at the schedule and tonight we have Electronica and House from JAPAN... it will be a home away from home. Actually, my mistake, that's a different club.

Think Felix the Housecat is playing tomorrow.

Fuk.u.ok Sumo and Sobriety

My Fukuoka weekends have always been fun, the last two in particular were great and I was really looking forward to getting up there again and seeing some Sumo. It was months in the planning and with any event planned with JETs it was often a headache. Despite my best efforts there was still confusion over how people were getting to the venue and confusion about which day we were seeing sumo event (though it was clearly stated on the email and then again in several others), someone even asked me for a map to the hotel, as if they couldn’t just get their own map...titter, sigh.

Anyway, once we all got together, were settled in our rooms and all ready to party then things were great. Sumo before going out was a laugh, I really enjoyed the company I was in and got a few drinks in before going out. Then we went to La Boheme, which is next to the Apple store in Tenjin, and I realised after we had eaten that I had been there before with Evania and on my last visit I remember breaking something in the toilets and wanting to leave very quickly, seems that I got away with that.
Food at La Boheme was pleasant enough and then we went onto the clubs and partied on. I ducked out kind of early and left the guys to go onto Fubar from Sam & Dave’s and instead I went to a reggae bar to meet up with a friend. I ended up at Fubar much much later and then ended up in my hotel at 5am.

The next day I felt like absolute shit, I was hung-o

ver and there was nothing to bring me out of my funk, not the $30 dollar and 6 course lunch, not the bagels with Maron-Maron cream cheese, not the Willy Wonka chocolate, the Christmas lights, the chance to touch a new iPod touch or the healthy fruit smoothie. I was in bits, and wasn’t great company as a result.
That evening we went for Mexican food at a place called La Borracha, the service was slow, the bill was enormous but the food was great. I can totally appreciate why Americans love Mexican food so much and why they would prefer it to ramen which is one of the things that Fukuoka is famed for, I got my Ramen fix the next day hidden in a both behind a curtain strangely enough.

After having Mexican I went back to the hotel and slept for an hour and 

then woke Patrick up to meet him down in the lobby so that we could head to the clubs again, but instead of waiting in the lobby I waited in the pub next to the lobby and drank a £5 pint of Guinness. I was waiting until 1 am when I realised that Patrick wasn’t going to come through the doors of the pub and join us, so instead of waiting longer Johnny and I went to hit the town.
Another 5am finish and I was feeling fucking shit this time around, in fact I have never had a hang over like this before. I was all hatred and self-loathing, I felt terrible physically and mentally drained, it was shocking.

It worried me how much alcohol could change my mood, and how terrible it could make me feel; it made me feel like something other than myself and that wasn’t pleasant. I was again extremely terrible company on the way back to Miyazaki in the car and I didn’t bounce back from that come down until Tuesday.

It’s now a week on from Fukuoka and I’ve not drunk alcohol since, and although I feel no different physically or health wise, I do feel better knowing that I’m doing something positive for myself.

I don’t think that I’m an alcoholic, nor that that was where I was headed, but I don’t think that I was drinking in a healthy way, I certainly wasn’t drinking responsibly and that bothered me.

I don’t know how long this self enforced ban will last but so far it’s survived several attempts of peer-pressure and belittlement; I find it odd that my not drinking seems so abhorrent to people, so strange that they must again convert me back to my old ways...that's people I guess, what else should I expect.

Anyway, that’s where I am right now, I still love Fukuoka, and am keen to get up there again. Although the people who I met there have all left which is a shame, I enjoyed their company because they knew who they were and didn’t judge me because of who I was. Perhaps Fukuoka will never be the same for me, but such is life.

Pictures of my Sumo Weekend can be found here.

Fuk U Ok A- I still Love You

Well, I get to Fukuoka after getting the night bus, I’m not well rested but I’m rested enough and I’m ready to shop.

I had wanted to see Evania whilst in Fukuoka but she had gone to Tokyo for the weekend to live it up in a no doubt stimulant fuelled 48 hours of fun and debauchery., good luck to her, wish I could trade places.


However, I had a mission. My Bape trainers have long been the trainer of choice when ducking my head into my shoe cupboard on the way out of my house, as a result they’ve become somewhat mangy, a look that I appreciate on trainers but if I’m wearing this pair to death then I will need another pair to look, um, “smart “ in.

there will be no sky gazing for me this morning. Plan B… breakfast.

However (again), I’ve arrived far too early to go shopping as the shops aren’t until 9am, it was currently 6.30am. I decide to leave my clothes etc in a locker, jump on a bus to a place I don’t know and walk around, see if I can find a park, put in the ipod (with broken iBuds) and chill out, making the clouds move with my mind, it was a wonderful day after all.

I get on the bus and I take it as far as 1000 yen will allow, I hop off and look for the park… there’s no park to be found. In fact this area is so devoid of social spaces I wonder if I’m still in Japan and imagine that the bus has dropped me in Birmingham or something, the area is distinctly and unerringly urban, there will be no sky gazing for me this morning. Plan B… breakfast.

Tenjin: full of short skirts, high heels, hair with too much hairspray and lads wearing eyeliner.

Plan B is hampered by the fact that every restaurant I pass on my now one hour plus hike through the projects is closed. I don’t let this dishearten me though; I see some very nice sites, a Harley Davidson shop being the most notable of these spottings.

Eventually I become bored of exploring this area and decide to head back to Tenjin, the downtown party area of Fukuoka and also home of the Apple store, first stop for me, I need to replace these headphones.

An hour later and I’m on a bus, it’s heading to Hakata and from there I will catch the subway to Tenjin, I’m on the home straight and nothing can stop me, I’m going to shop like a madman and then drop like a sack of spuds.


Tenjin: full of short skirts, high heels, hair with too much hairspray and lads wearing eyeliner. Straight to the Apple store. One wireless keyboard, one wireless mouse and one pair of headphones. Next, Bape!

Camera’s rolling and gums flapping ... my heart fills with dread

There was a queue outside Bape, its because there’s a new line of women’s and men’s wear, I’m not interested. I tell the staff that I just want shoes and they let me go past the queue. I’m there for 5 minutes and I’ve made up my mind that there are only two possible choices, the pink and black pair or the beige, orange and white pair, five minutes later and the choice has grown to three pairs of trainers and one pair of sandals. I had to jump in and cull the choices, reducing an increasing number of shoes to an affordable number before I sell my return tickets to Miyazaki. I opted for the sandals; camouflage Birkenstocks with the Bape monkey hidden in the design and the trainers with an air bubble in muted orange and tan, lovely, retro, bit ironic.




Time to hunt for the park again.

No such luck. The nearest estimation of a park I find is a concrete amphitheatre with a shallow rectangular puddle in the middle. But people are chilling out there, so I can’t accuse it of not being a public space.

I sit on a wall and watch kids practicing their keep-up skills with a football, they were very good, incorporating hand-stands and jumps into their tricks, all very showy. Whilst sat, a couple came into the park followed by a camera crew. I watched as the man gestured toward me and whatever he was saying was interrupted by the presenter who was dressed in a gaudy looking tweed jacket with clashing salmon tie. Camera’s rolling and gums flapping, I wonder what they’re up to and then my heart fills with dread as the couple make a direct line toward me.

“Please, take our picture.”

The man says to me in rehearsed English.

“Of course.”

I reply, deciding that ‘OK’ was to unsophisticated an answer for such an amazing polyglot. He handed me a Polaroid camera and I fixed them in the view finder being sure to observe the rule of thirds and put the girls eye level at roughly 2/3 up the frame… snap, and they’re away to talk to the presenter again, hopefully admonishing him for wearing such a god-awful tie in a public place.

The weather was beautiful that day, perfect light, perfect blue sky, light fluffy white clouds and a breeze which gave relief to any unpleasantness from a naked yellow sun which stood proud and unabashedly flashed me. I needed sun glasses.

she was impulsive and free, she laughed heartily at her own jokes ... before collecting herself to fix you with a serious look and talk at speed about things you didn’t understand

Sunglasses are a necessity for any people-watcher on a sunny day, I do hate to stare, but I do love to watch and with the backcombing, keeppy uppy’s and the now three camera crews milling about, it was now very difficult not to stare let alone watch.

The most impressive sight was an hourglass shaped Mediterranean woman, with dark features and long hair. She was wearing a pair of jogging bottoms and a half-length t-shirt with cut-off sleeves. She sat by the rectangular pond and read. I imagined that she was reading a script and that she was in character for, I toyed with the idea of approaching her for a moment, and fantasised that she might talk to me in character. In my fantasy she was impulsive and free, she laughed heartily at her own jokes and swung her head back before collecting herself to fix you with a serious look and talk at speed about things you didn’t understand. She was extrovert and bold and open and intriguing. I imagined an afternoon falling in love with her and then she left, and as she said goodbye the façade of her character was removed and I was left waving away a total stranger, someone other than the person I had spent the day with. I imagined I was desperately heartbroken and disappointed so, I no longer entertained the idea of approaching her.

AFter this unfulfilled fantasy I went to an Itallian restaurant which had Star Wars music playing in the background, but there was a twist, the music was played on the panpipes, I was impressed. Then I waited, I waited at the airport waiting for my parents to arrive for Golden Week, whilst I waited I listened to my iPod with my new headphones, cooed over my new keyboard and studied Japanese.

I love Fukuoka, my little playground whether its day or night, whether I'm alone or with friends I've never failed to have fun there.

Bikers from Miyazaki

Stressing out!

Not only am I arranging a trip to visit Vietnam in April, but my mum and now my dad are coming to Japan in April. Then, Tom is coming in July for Fuji Rock and I have to go home for my family reunion in August.

Breathe Stephen, take it easy and take it one step at a time.

The whole Vietnam trip is proving to be a pain in the neck. I didn’t expect that I would have to take so many days off to get over there but it turns out that I will have to take at least two and more like 3, leaving me with 7 days of paid holiday left. The problem is that it takes 10 hours to get from Fukuoka to Hanoi (14 hours from Miyazaki to Hanoi) because there are no direct flights on the days I want. Fantastic! I only want to pop over for a weekend and it’s turning out to be a real headache.

Which puts me in no mood whatsoever to run around booking this and that for my mother, she’s booked her international tickets after a lot of confusion and stress. Her original itinerary dropped her in Tokyo with a train ticket to get to Miyazaki. Getting from Tokyo to Miyazaki is a feat none to taxing seeing as Miyazaki and Tokyo are on different islands. Now she’s coming into Fukuoka and I’m spending a weekend there before heading back to Miyazaki for work.

My dad is coming too, which has its plusses and drawbacks. A plus is that my dad can keep my mum company whilst I’m at work and another is that they both can drive so, if they both apply for international licenses it will make the trips around Miyazaki so much easier.

I think that I will take my parents into school on Tuesday for show and tell

It amuses me when I think about three black people being in Saito at the same time, I’m sure that has never happened before. I’ve caused commotion enough by myself; I can’t imagine how it’s going to be with two people with dreadlocks and one man almost 6 foot 6 tall. I think that I will take my parents into school on Tuesday for show and tell, I can’t wait until the teachers hear my dads accent.

Apart from taking my ‘rents to School, I want to show them Saitobaru, the various shrines and temples of Saito and of course the onsen… must mentally prepare myself for the last one as I don’t think I’ve ever seen my dad naked… scratch that, must mentally put that aside for the moment. Oh and Edfifune Eel restaurant too, must go there, as well as try some famous Miyazaki beef and Chicken Namban.

I guess I will take my parents to Taiko too. Although, looking at the calendar I don’t know if I will get a chance. The real question is ‘what do I do on the days I’m not working?’ A few people have suggested going to Kyoto, I guess it makes sense, that's the type of Japan they want to see after all, but I kind of want to show them another type of Japan. And I definitely want to avoid the Golden Week tourists going to Kyoto that weekend.

The Flaming Lips, Rage Against The Machine, The Killers, The New Pornographers, Radiohead and Aswad

Then there’s Tom and Fuji Rock. Oh my, the (rumoured) line up to this festival is unexpectedly good. Notable (rumoured) guests include The Flaming Lips, Rage Against The Machine, The Killers, The New Pornographers, Radiohead and Aswad. Yes, the one and only Aswad.
I’m really pleased that Tom has decided to try to come over, it seems that he has really got the travel bug of late, his last holiday was in Marakesh. He’s also going for a new job and educating himself to be a mortgage advisor, something I think he will be well suited to do, so all in all I’m pretty proud of him. Also it will be great to see a face from back home, I don’t think I will get to visit everyone when I go back for my reunion.

The reunion. The final big splurge before Christmas, which I think I will spend in Japan this year. Reunion promises to be good, the family back home have really dug in and it seems like everyone has made a contribution

Thailand

Index- use these links to skip to the sections of this blog.

1. The Journal
2. Bangkok
3. Maz
4. Khao Sok
5. A Quick Bite
6. Passport
7. The Narrative of Stephen Walrond of Saito
8. Happy New Years
   

Thailand: The Journal

Apparently blogs are a cry for attention, much like slitting your own wrists or playing truant from school whilst sniffing glue.

This isn’t my opinion, oh no. My opinion, if not stated clearly enough in my blog manifesto, is that blogs are for public thoughts placed in a public forum to entertain and inform a specific audience and give them a chance to interact, reply, debate or question.

This is my opinion: Journals, as I understand them, are a waste of time, ink and paper or electricity. A person writes their thoughts down as if to do so clarifies them and makes sure they do not disappear into the ether, and then in the journal they remain never to be seen by a living soul save the author. It’s like painting a self portrait and only ever looking at it yourself.
I will admit that there is a certain amount of vanity involved in blogging, but more than that it I would like it to be a social thing, to spark conversation and also to stop ideas floating into the ether.

All of that aside, I attempted to write a journal in the original sense of the word, but it soon became boring. My photos serve well enough as a journal of my time in Thailand so I will use them to illustrate this blog entry.

Thailand: Bangkok

Adjectives which describe Bangkok: Large, busy, hot, impoverished, dirty, grimy, littered, commercial, exciting, sleazy, beautiful, ugly, traditionalistic, marvellous, awesome, historic, fast, laid back, boozy, western, eastern.











Thailand: Maz

I like my conversations with Maz.
She has things to say which must be said now and with passion.
The things she says amuse me and make me want to prompt her to say more.

Maz will talk a lot about what she wants from life, from friendships, from family and relationships. She knows herself very well, that's unusual and deserved of respect.

Thankfully Maz was my travelling companion.



Thailand: Khao Sok



Verbs and Verb Phrases describing things done in khao Sok: Chewed Coca Leaf, drank, ate, was merry, slept, got bitten, trekked, trekked at night, trekked by elephant, trekked some more, swam in rivers, waded, took photos, met people, talked, slept in the jungle, ate from the hollow of a pineapple, arrived, left.













Thailand: A quick bite

The food is good! Thai people have food down, oh yes, they do food very well. Green chicken curry, Pad Thai, soups, snacks, fruits, insects, I loved them all.

To my surprise its not just Thai food that the Thai’s do well. They do German food (Meatballs and Mash), British food (roast ham, cheese and mustard sarnies) and Indian food (Chicken Tika Masala, Butter Nan etc) well too. Everything is on the menu, pizza, seafood, burgers, ice creams, my ankle, my knee, my shoulder, ostrich steak, alligator and my wrist.

Oh, and my thigh comes highly recommended, a particular favourite with the bed-bug crowd, the less picky mossy crowd taking ankle and even toe, the philistines.

Yes, it seems that I’ve once again served myself up as a buffet for any six-legged son of a larvae patch that fancies some dark meat. I can’t help but wonder if I have brought this upon myself though as I happily indulged in such Thai delicacies as cricket, and maggot.

Well hopefully now the insect kingdom and I are even, maybe we can call a truce… please.



Thailand: Passport

I left my passport
Past the port
Past the hill
And far behind this stretch of sea
I left my passport behind me
So I must go back
To retrieve my identity

Thailand: The Narrative of Stephen Walrond of Saito

I sat quietly brooding, damning myself for being so careless as to leave my passport at the messy hovel I had slept the night before. I would have been more enthusiastic in my self-admonishment had I not felt the severe weariness brought by sleep deprivation and alcohol abuse.

The night before had been much like the night before that, save the fire, but more about that later. I had left the apartment at some point with Marion, I proceeded to drink too much and eat too much and become far too drunk as a result. I had danced on chairs, had deep conversations about the nature of relationships and finally drank so much that my merriment turned into bewilderment and then the next stage I had become abusive and surly. I took myself to bed before I said anything to provocative and slept quite uncomfortably but well enough to be oblivious of Marion’s return.

I woke on New Years Day, showered and put on the cleanest clothes I could find. Marion and I packed our things and discussed the events of New Years Eve and then she laid out the itinerary for the day, mostly boat trips and transfers from boats to busses, I took very little interest in any of it safe in the knowledge that sticking close to Marion would lead me in the right direction.

We handed in our keys and paid the remainder of out bill and I was thankful that this would be the last encounter with the disagreeable custodian of Yoghurt Home 3. He was much like other Thai people; he would repeat each instruction hurriedly with flailing gestures and not an ounce of civility. I couldn’t stand him but smiled and nodded politely hoping that some common courteousness would rub off on him. Keys given in and money paid our business was concluded and we set about leaving for the boat.

One crowded taxi ride later and we are at the port waiting in the mid day sun for the ferry to arrive. Whilst in the taxi my stomach swam with the sickness of a nights abuse and every lurch or sudden stop would encourage it to torment me further. A dull throbbing and the insipid conversation of the other passengers similarly abused my head. These self appointed bastions of ‘Koh Phangan cool’ virulently characterised what they called ‘the new comers’, those who had ruined Koh Phangan and seemed to be each responsible for the bastions having a terrible New Years. Apparently Koh Phangan was better in the old days when it was left to the bastions and the bastions alone, I silently disagreed, despite my current state I thought the night before was tremendous fun and reckoned that previous years were equally tremendous too.

The swaying of the small rusted boat had the affect of calming the violence in my stomach and making me feel drowsy. I fell half asleep and as often is the case I amused myself by making poetry in my head. It would always frustrates me that I can never recall the poetry I think and put it straight to paper, this time however I was content with just thinking the poetry know full well that they would never be heard again, not even by me.

Our transport was about to make its first stop at Koh Samui when a vague feeling of dread engulfed me. I had forgotten to take my passport from the disagreeable proprietor of the over priced ghetto I had just left, and he had forgotten to offer it to me.

I had to go back, I had to alight at Koh Samui and return to him and get my passport, if I could have been there that instance I would have struck the man about the face with a clenched fist and all the contempt I had felt for him and myself. Instead I had to quietly brood until brooding became wallowing and self-pity turned to self-doubt.

It was New Years day and my muddied head was so full of piteous and deriding thoughts aimed squarely at my own feet that I wondered, if this was how 2007 was to go on whether I wanted to see the rest of the year at all. What a terrible beginning it was, a foolish mistake, much like others I had made before, stupid and thoughtless and bloody inconvenient. I was vexed beyond consoling when I left the boat and I remained much in the same mood whilst I waited for a vessel to return me to Koh Phangan.

Hours past and I distracted myself with coffee and cake and when it was time to board I drew a deep relieved breath, entered the craft and sat sullenly infront of a TV screen.

Happy New Years

Then, something odd happened. I was on the ferry watching the rubbish TV they had put on, making my way back to Koh Phangan, and all these boy-bands songs are playing, and I'm pretty sick of them, then Robbie Williams comes on singing My Way by Frank Sinatra, and I swear to god it was like a sudden moment of clarity.

I realised that I was worrying so much about the small mistakes and minor inconveniences that I was missing the fact that I was having a great adventure. It was the line "mistakes, I've made a few, but too few for me to mention", I realised that anytime something goes a little wrong I act like my life is a house of cards and they've collapsed from the bottom. I forget that with patiences I can rebuild the house with the extra knowledge of what makes the house fall.

Then I felt as if I was at piece, I enjoyed another Koh Phangan sunset, collected my passport and had a smoke with a lad from Nottingham. I went to bed convinced that I was meant to forget my passport because I was meant to learn that lesson from Robbie Williams.

Thailand: A Ring of Fire

Love is a burning thing

and it makes a firery ring
bound by wild desire
I fell in to a ring of fire...

I fell in to a burning ring of fire
I went down,down,down
and the flames went higher.
And it burns,burns,burns
the ring of fire
the ring of fire.

The taste of love is sweet
when hearts like our's meet
I fell for you like a child
oh, but the fire went wild..

So, as this picture shows, being drunk doesn't make you fire proof and, jumping through rings of fire is stupid.

A list of things I've done in Thailand so far.

No real time to blog, so here's the quickest, laziest blog entry ever.

• Saw the recling budha.
• Got a Thai massage.
• Saw the palace and all that stuff.
• Ate some Thai food.
• Ate some more Thai food.
• Took a Thai cooking class.
• Ate some more Thai food.
• Got a lap-dance from a 45 year old woman.
• Got chatted up by a transgender male.
• Rode a tuk-tuk.
• Went to a house club.
• Visited the night market.

Bring on day three. Off to Khao Sok. Pictures and stuff will follow my return to Japan.

Fuk U Ok A: Japanese Learning Proficency Test

Saturday morning… hung-over.

So I’ve decided that I’m not taking the test. I don’t feel it will be a positive experience that I will take anything from except confirmation of what I already know to be true and that is that I’m not very good at Japanese. I’ve not been motivated to rise to the challenge of the JLPT and this is odd as I came over here for the challenges, but this one challenge I feel won’t benefit me at this moment in time.

My lack of Japanese language skill is a huge problem, bigger than I would have previously admitted. It was recently brought to my attention that I express no gratitude to the people who help me at taiko practice, it wasn’t put in that nice a way but the point was the same. When I was accused my rebuttal was that I didn’t even know the word for gratitude in the language, I had simply assumed that my diligence and commitment would convey gratitude enough.
So this is one motivation to learn more Japanese, but my main motivation is that I really need to socialise with people who aren’t JETs.

The ability of some people to make a mountain out of a molehill, to harbour ill will or bad feelings and lose sense of perspective... is like a circus act of negativity

I try, and fail abysmally, to not be critical of people, to accept them on face value and be aware that everyone is flawed. Other JETs however are very intolerant to flawed personalities, which would be fine in its self if this simply led to them giving each other a wide berth. However, it too often leads to one JET being very vocal about their grievance about another JET in some cases so much so it seems that a slur campaign is being run against them.

The ability of some people to make a mountain out of a molehill (しんしょうぼうだい）、to harbour ill will or bad feelings and lose sense of perspective all at the same time is like a circus act of negativity, imagine someone juggling whilst riding a unicycle over a tightrope, stressful right?

But as for the test? I’m in the big city and I should be having fun.

Saturday afternoon, dinner with Evania.



Evania points out that quitting is just like failing. I think to myself that quitting is a lot easier than failing. She talks to me about not taking the test and says a few things to encourage me and I decide to take the test. At this moment its resolute in my mind, I’m taking the test! Which means there will be no wild parties tonight for me, early to bed… alone.

Saturday night, far too sober.

I hate being spoken down to! Someone, he will remain nameless for the moment seems to think it appropriate to speak to me like I’m his fucking hired hand. The cheek of the fucking goon! This encounter only makes me want to learn Japanese more so I can shake these absolute losers.

I remain furious for the rest of the evening, so much so I cannot sleep. I attempt to watch a movie at Evania’s and just as it gets interesting, I’m out like a light.

Sunday morning, alarm ringing, I’ve not had enough sleep.

Test morning! Need to be at the centre by such and such a time, need to get out of here now! Nothing goes smoothly, can’t repack my bag, can’t get the shower to run with hot water, can’t figure out how to lock the front door of Evania’s place! I get to the station, get on a train, get to Tenjin, get on the street, look for the bus centre… not a clue, ask for directions, directions given in Japanese, not a clue. Finally find the place! The bus station is on the third floor of a building, weird. Buy a ticket, look at the time, test begins in 10 minutes, trip on the bus lasts 30 minutes, I’ve missed the test, but I’m not bothered.

missed the test on a heavy comedown with no regrets

It occurs to me later that if I had stuck to my original plan I could have gone and partied with Evania and her friends and I would have missed the test on a heavy comedown with no regrets, now I regret spending Saturday night half watching TV.